transition

Im surprised at my morning prayer today. I don't know where it came from but it seems to have sprung from the deepest recess of my heart.

It's funny that the first person i thought of the moment I woke up today is the guy I've been crushing on for almost 2months now. I've met him way way back and never saw him the way i see him now until we got close, became seatmates and chatted for a short yet sensible moment. That was like, my sleeping heart leapt from deep slumber. After that first encounter, i tried to erase every memory of him, still scared to entertain thoughts of a possible lovelife since i just came from a major heartbreak. But destiny is really playing on me. As time went by we became closer and closer, and i got to realize that we have so much in common. And i am even surprised that i can be myself around him: i can chat all day at any topic and goof around without reservation. The tough girl that I am didnt even hesitate to get out of my shell when i am near him.

As i relish this new found friendship, ironically, i pray that my feelings for him would eventually fade. If this person isn't meant to stay long in my life, I hope he'd just go while still in this early stage. After several failed relationships, i don't want this to be another failure. So before I totally fall in love with this person, i pray that I may be given the courage to simply walk away.